Silince

For the past few months I’ve been struggling with myself. Why do I feel worthless and lonely? Is it me or is it the people around me? What am I doing? What should I do? Etc.

Since I moved to Breda to study at the arts academy, things got downwards. Why? Well..

- I was just 17 years old (1,5 months) when I moved here.
- I had to move to the other side of the country (about 300km from home)
- This ment living on my own. Cooking, cleaning, paying the bills, doing homework, building a social life etc.
- People here are very different from where I come from.
- The art academy is not an easy school. You’ve got to be creative continuously. It takes over your life!

After going to the arts academy for about 6 months I decided to quit. It was all a bit too much for me. All those things you had to think about all at once.. my mind got crazy! I felt like my brain could explode any minute.

It’s not like everything was bad but I just feels that way. Of course, I learned a lot over these past few months but this was just too much in such little time. It feels like I’m growing up in sixth gear.

Anyway.. after ‘cooling down’ a bit I started thinking.. what to do with the 6 months ahead of me. I’d love to travel but don’t have the money for it. So I started searching for jobs abroad. This way you travel and don’t have to worry about money as you earn it on the go.

I would love to go to Norway.. although finding work there isn’t easy because most employers want people who are over 18 years old and have a drivers license. Well I don’t I meet both requirements as I have to wait till July to become 18.

I know things will be better with time but right now I feel like everything is working against me? And I hate that feeling.

I edited my theme so the photos are larger. better?